I used to take it as a compliment when charge would say, "I'm giving you this patient because I know you can handle it." Now I hear it and my stomach drops a little. I'm not the smartest nurse on the unit and I'm definitely not some superhero. I'm just pretty calm when shit goes sideways, I don't disappear when somebody needs help and I can usually keep a rough assignment from turning into a complete disaster. Apparently that's become my entire work personality. Last shift I walked in and could tell immediately my assignment was heavier than everyone else's. Two high-acuity patients, one confused fall risk who needed constant redirection, plus an admission already on the way. I asked about it and charge basically went, "I know it sucks, but I needed someone strong in that section." That was it. And honestly, she wasn't even being shitty about it. She was drowning too, which somehow made it harder to be mad. I got through the shift. Everyone got their meds. Nobody fell. Got the admission settled. Helped with somebody else's rapid when I had a minute and somehow even finished charting before sunrise. Then I sat in my car for like ten minutes afterward because I just felt... used. There are nurses on my unit who complain the second they get a rough assignment, refuse extra stuff, or make enough noise that everybody knows not to keep piling things on them. I've always hated doing that. I thought being dependable mattered. I wanted my coworkers to know I'd pull my weight. But apparently if you quietly handle shitty assignments, people just learn that you'll quietly handle shitty assignments. That's the part I'm struggling with. I still want to be somebody my coworkers can rely on. If a patient is crashing, I'm not gonna suddenly decide "not my problem." I actually like being useful and I'm proud that people trust me when things get messy. I just don't want "she can handle it" to keep meaning "give it to her." I think I need to get better at being dependable without making myself the easiest person on the unit to overload   submitted by   /u/LeafCocoaPunkS [link]   [comments]