Welcome to LOST WEEKEND, VICE’s new Monday briefing.As with many things online, MMA fighter Cole “Wavy” Johnson’s claim that he could beat an ape in unarmed combat was a joke that got completely out of hand. @wavy.mma #mma #manvschimp #combatsports #wrestling #chimpanzee ♬ original sound – Wavy Throughout the week, the counter on WavyVsChimp.com grimly ticked away the days, hours, minutes, and seconds leading up to this most weird and unethical of PPVs.What exactly was going to happen when zero finally hit? Were countless viewers from around the world really about to watch someone being flayed alive by a wild beast? Or were we going to witness an innocent, child-sized marvel of the natural world being mercilessly body-slammed and choked into submission? It felt like whatever happened, any viewer would be profoundly diminished by the experience—which seemed only right for an event billed as the “biggest night on the internet.” It was apt, too, that you could bet on it (“Pick a side. Lock it in. Be a part of history”) by buying Cole Johnson’s meme coins, of course.1-0 amateur MMA fighter Cole Johnson announced he’s fighting a full-grown chimpanzee live on September 11 pic.twitter.com/10fTewsJNY— Happy Punch (@HappyPunch) September 5, 2026Factoring in the time difference, I stayed up till 3AM Saturday waiting to see if this “fight” would take place. It hardly came as a surprise when it failed to materialize; when the countdown finished and the bell rang, Cole posted his big reveal; an AI-generated image of him hugging a chimp along with a receipt for a donation to the Jane Goodall Institute. (The global conservation organization, set up to continue the work of the late English primatologist, has been approached by VICE for comment about this debacle. It is yet to respond.) View this post on Instagram I got the 24-year-old amateur MMA fighter on the phone to hear first hand how the fight he’d loudly insisted would take place was, in fact, an elaborate ruse, and anyone naive enough to take him at his word is actually a complete idiot. VICE: How did you come up with this whole thing?Cole “Wavy” Johnson: I’m just a fighter and a crazy guy. I’m always making jokes, and I posted that first video like, “Hey, I’ll destroy a chimp,” just trying to make people laugh. But actually, it’s a good comparison, too—people definitely overestimate chimps and underestimate humans.People picked up on it like crazy. I’ve been posting a long time, and if I throw something out there and it starts hitting, you better bet I’m gonna milk the hell out of it. I told everyone, “Give me 500k. I’m going to fight a chimp.” You think anyone’s giving me money to fight a chimp? But everyone believed it, obviously. @wavy.mma #manvschimp #chimpanzee #wavymma #mma #chimps ♬ original sound – Wavy So I made a website, set this timer, and I was like, “All right, let me just do next Friday,” and then, all of a sudden: “Oh shit, I didn’t realize this is on 9/11. That’s not good.”Are you surprised that the Daily Mail went with it?Well, I know I’m a really good bullshitter and that TikTok’s full of 12-year-olds, but I was surprised. I told all these dudes I’m fighting a polar bear with a sword, and nobody thought, “Maybe this guy’s fucking around.” The whole thing is ridiculous.How did it go down with the crypto?I like trolling the internet, so I was like, “Might as well make a couple crypto coins, get some money involved.” All the idiots started throwing their money into these two coins, the Chimp Coin and the Wavy Coin. Over a million dollars went through both.We had hundreds of thousands of people on that stream. I was gonna do an AI video of the warm-up, not me fighting it, because I wanted the crypto to rip, but the video looked like trash. So I ended up just putting a rickroll in there. It was probably one of the biggest rickrolls of all time. @wavy.mma ♬ original sound – Wavy All these dudes who were trying to watch animal abuse and trying to bet on it lost their money. Some people made a bunch of money, too. It was a mess.Did you make money on it?I could have rug-pulled it, but I didn’t put any money in the coin because I don’t want to deal with lawyers. I made creator fees from the platform, which is still a good amount. I kept some and donated some to a charity for chimpanzees. I’m not going to disclose the amount because I don’t even want anyone to know how much I made or sent, but it was a good chunk.“Dude, 100 percent I am straight-up crazy, but I would never abuse an animal or actually follow through with something like this”I’m not sure Jane would’ve been into jokes about knocking out a chimp with one punch.There’s a difference between making jokes online and actually doing something like that. Dude, 100 percent I am straight-up crazy, but I would never abuse an animal or actually follow through with something like this.You’re not worried about the FBI turning up at your door, then?I was half expecting the FBI to show up when I was convincing people I’m doing this shit. Maybe I did get reported to them. They probably looked at it, laughed, and knew I was joking. I didn’t do anything illegal. They can’t do anything.Do you worry that you’ll always be Googleable as the guy who said he was going to fight a chimp?No, I’m going to do way bigger things than that. There’s going to be a new story within a month. I have more money to make better content now. There’s a tribe in Africa I’ve been talking to, out in Senegal. I want to go with that tribe because they have traditional wrestling out there. I have legendary ideas, bro. This is just the beginning.Are you hoping to make a run at MMA, or is influencing the priority?We’ll see. My goal isn’t to get farmed by some organization. I’m going to grow my following. I’m still going to become the best fighter I can be, whether I set up my own fights or work with Logan Paul or Jake Paul or something. I’m thinking about the bigger picture, obviously. @wavy.mma #wavymma #chimpanzee #manvschimp #chimp ♬ original sound – Wavy OTHER NEWSAfter firing back at the Ukrainian government’s claims that his film DAU is Russian propaganda, Ilya Khrzhanovsky has won the Silver Lion for Best Director at the Venice Film Festival—and while I doubt it’s going to be as sickeningly bombastic as drone-strike footage from the front lines, I’m still looking forward to watching it.I’ve been busy with a bone saw and a soldering iron, trying to fit myself with a homemade brain chip so I can understand Elias Rønnenfelt singing in Danish for the first time since a 2013 Iceage track. He’s just released “Legionær”, a collaborative single with Afskum, one of the most intriguing new voices working in any language right now. I followed the schematics perfectly, but I still can’t understand what they’re saying—I can taste the internet, though (it’s just like highly chlorinated chicken).And congratulations to streamer Kai Cenat whose clothing label Vivet debuted its first runway collection at New York Fashion Week. Unfortunately, everyone involved in this has just been placed on a Skynet kill list because of that time he pushed a humanoid robot over in one of his videos. PREDICTION FOR THE WEEKFollowing the row over whether you should or shouldn’t be free to shit yourself at Hyrox events, a rogue splinter group set up a new competition where endurance athletes are required to race with clenched buttocks after taking a hero’s dose of laxatives.BRAND NEW SENTENCE“I do not support pacing frontier models. If I am going to die at the hands of killer AI, I want it to be American, not Chinese. Buy American, Die American.”BONUS PREDICTION: WHAT NEXT FOR WAVY?Cole Johnson will capitalize on his new-found notoriety by filming his own “Never Gonna Give You Up” music video with a drumming gorilla who will remove his mask at the end of the track to reveal his next opponent: Conor McGregor (the fight will obviously never go ahead). Follow Adam on Instagram @yungtolstoiThe post ‘It Was a Mess’: We Spoke to the MMA Fighter Who Said He’d Fight a Chimp appeared first on VICE.