satit - stock.adobe.com Attending a wedding usually guarantees a few standard things: a beautiful ceremony, a lot of dancing, and a hearty meal to keep you fortified during the festivities. But one redditor in r/weddingshaming attended a nine-hour celebration and discovered that the promised dinner would not be served. What ensued was a chaotic scramble for appetizers and a hunt for local pizza: Recently I was invited to a wedding that lasted from 3pm to midnight. Since the invitation said dinner would be served, and we were also told there would be lots of appetizers, my husband and I ate a light lunch then went. The first sign of trouble was when the waiters only brought out one or two trays of appetizers every 15 minutes or so to serve over 200 guests. The younger and more fit guests started congregating by the kitchen and swarming the waiters, so the food never made it the older and less fit guests. After a couple of hours of this, the guests started getting hangry and were practically fighting to get an occasional morsel of food. Sharp elbows were thrown! I politely asked the bride’s mom what time dinner would be served. She said that the dinner turned out to be too expensive so they were just doing the appetizers, and repeated the claim there would be lots of them. Turned out not to be true, so around 7pm my husband, I, and about 30 other ravenous guests went to a pizza place across the street to eat. Other guests started doing this too and the pizza place was amazed by the rush of elegantly dressed customers gobbling up rather mediocre pizza like starving wolverines. Although we tried to discreet about the trip to pizza place, when we got back, we were tartly informed by the bride’s mom that it was very rude to leave the wedding. Later that night the groom’s grandmother actually fainted from hunger and an ambulance had to be called. Fortunately she was ok after a few hours of treatment in the ER. I felt we should have all gotten t-shirts saying that we’d survived the nearly food-less reception. In the comments, some redditors express outrage and validation, while others are sharing their own traumatic tales of starvation celebrations. Hostages in formal wear It did not take long for readers to point out the absurdity of keeping 200 people trapped at a venue for nine hours without proper sustenance. Comment in r/weddingshaming we were tartly informed by the bride’s mom that it was very rude to leave the wedding. ^^ Did she think you were all hostages? You gotta eat. If they weren't providing adequate sustenance from 3 pm- midnight, what exactly did she expect everyone to do? She's lucky you all came back. I probably would have bounced. Comment in r/weddingshaming "it was very rude to leave the wedding." Yeah, well, it's even more rude to hold 200 people hostage for 9 hours without food. Sadistic, even. Comment in r/weddingshaming The mother of the bride should have had pizzas delivered. She had some nerve telling you it was rude to leave to eat! Ma’am, clearly this is not a Wendy’s! Event budgeting 101: Never cut the catering If a couple lacks the funds for a big feast at their 200-person wedding, the polite route is to adjust the schedule or clearly warn attendees beforehand. Comment in r/weddingshaming It blows my mind anytime someone doesn’t prioritize food for a wedding. There are things you can cut from a wedding to stay in budget, food should NEVER be on that list. Comment in r/weddingshaming Even if they are - you can have a cake and punch reception. Nobody thinks any less of that, unless you aren't UP FRONT about it. But you shouldn't have an event around lunch or dinner time, TELL PEOPLE you're going to serve dinner, and then NOT serve dinner. That's tacky. Comment in r/weddingshaming Ah, the myth of "heavy appetizers." For this to actually work in place of a meal, they have to be very heavy indeed, and served at a cocktail party, early evening reception, or other event where people will leave and get real food. They're supposed to tide you over, not keep you dancing until midnight. It's a faux pas across cultures For many redditors who come from cultures that prioritize communal dining and generous hosting, the idea of a food-less reception goes beyond bad manners — it's an unforgivable offense. Comment in r/weddingshaming here in italy they stuff you already with the morning reception, and you can't eat anymore by lunch. and the lunch goes on to dinner. if something described by op happened here it would be a GENERATIONAL shame and would probably lead to multiple divorces while the parents of the marrying couple would enegage in mortal kombat to establish who is responsible for the desacration of starving guests Comment in r/weddingshaming The Mexican in my can’t comprehend throwing a party and not having enough of food for everyone. You usually feed your guests at the reception and since the party usually goes late, there’s a “tornaboda” element where the guests that have been dancing and drinking for a few hours are served a late night snack, less fancy than dinner, usually tacos. When planning my wedding my mom told me: as long as the music, drinks and food is good, it will be a good wedding. Comment in r/weddingshaming Yikes. My barometer of what's enough food is somewhere around "No less than what Marie Barone would serve." The trauma of the un-fed guest Misery loves company, and this post unlocked a flood of memories from others who have suffered through similarly unsatisfying receptions. Comment in r/weddingshaming I attended a wedding like this. It was at a really expensive golf course, because the couple had both worked for the catering company that had a restaurant there. It's during dinner time and assumed, based off of the invitation, that dinner would be served. No dinner. Just appetizers. Also, no seats lol, just a few cocktail tables, not enough for everyone. It was outside, and it started raining. A group of us ended up at the pub style restaurant inside and ordered dinner. The couple got annoyed, but its like, wtf?!? You invited adults to a Friday night wedding and didn't feed us! If can't afford to have a wedding, don't! My husband and I had a dinner for immediate family, plus the friend (and his wife) that married us. 20 people, it was lovely, and we didn't go into debt for it. Comment in r/weddingshaming It's fine as long as the guests are told beforehand. I went to a wedding that served only cake about 15 years ago. It was a 5 pm ceremony with a 7 pm reception. Nowhere did it say dinner would not be served and it's fair to assume an evening reception will have dinner. There were also no appetizers during the cocktail hour (no cocktails either). Similar to OP, the guests ordered pizza from a local place to be delivered to the venue. My date and I didn't have smartphones and were not from the area, so when we left the wedding, we just drove until we saw a sign for Wendy's off the highway, so my dinner (and my date's) was Wendy's at 10 pm off the highway in middle-of-nowhere Tennessee -_- Comment in r/weddingshaming I held an evening reception yesterday (I’m an events manager) where the bride and groom arrived by horse and carriage 20 minutes late, where the guests had to stand outside in the rain waiting for them. They only served some cheese and meat, plus a Collin the Caterpillar cake for 59 people. For non-Brits, it’s a store bought cake that costs about £10 maybe. These poor people were starving, but hey she had a second dress reveal!She sent an email today complaining that we hadn’t cleared the car park for the horse and cart, and nobody cheered when she arrived. Also that it was raining and nobody wanted to be on the lawns for the drinks reception As these tales of woe illustrate, if you invite hundreds of people to celebrate your love for an afternoon and evening, you absolutely must provide fuel to keep the party alive. What would you have done? Read the full story in r/weddingshaming, and find more conversations like this in r/weddings, r/TrueOffMyChest, and r/AskReddit. This story highlights the perspectives of Reddit users, not Reddit, Inc. Some posts or comments may be lightly edited for clarity. Questions or concerns? Contact us at upvoted@reddit.com.