Modern dating can often leave people caught between connection and commitment (Image Source: Pixabay)A maybelatership or maybelationship is when two people stay stuck in undefined dating dynamics, not single, not together, held indefinitely in a state of ‘maybe later.’ Neither person calls it a relationship, but neither walks away either. Explaining this, Damini Grover, a counselling psychologist, author and life coach, says, “There can be attraction, emotional intimacy, regular communication and even relationship-like behaviours but no clear understanding of what the two people are building together.”DISCLAIMER: This article is based on information from the public domain and/or the experts we spoke to.So how exactly does this work?According to Damini, “A maybelationship can live in the ‘maybe’ zone without the sense of progression that even a slow-burn relationship has, where two people may be taking their time but there is some sense of progression.” However, what holds people in is often not what the relationship is now, but what they think it could be.Separating it from casual dating, Damini says that a maybelatership is emotionally complicated. “It is when you feel like there’s something there, but you don’t know where it’s going,” she adds.Why do people keep choosing that avoidance over commitmentDr Chandni Tugnait, psychotherapist, life alchemist, coach & healer, and the founder & director of Gateway of Healing, mentions the following reasons: Deciding feels riskier than waiting: Commitment means picking one person and closing the door on every alternative – a decision that feels permanent the moment it’s spoken out loud. Staying undefined lets someone keep feeling close to a person without ever having to make that call. Delaying the decision feels safer than making the wrong one, even when the delay quietly costs something. Nobody risks a real rejection: As long as nothing is officially named, nobody can technically be turned down. A clear ask invites chances of a clear no, while staying vague means both people can walk away later and claim it was never that serious to begin with. Ambiguity offers a kind of insurance against the specific pain of being told directly that you weren’t wanted, which stings far more than simply drifting apart.ALSO READ | Sonakshi Sinha says she’s ‘very dependent’ on Zaheer Iqbal: ‘For like rubbish things…’ It asks for less: A defined relationship comes with expectations, consistency, honesty, showing up even when it’s inconvenient. A maybelatership asks for none. People choosing ambiguity are often choosing the version of connection that requires the least accountability, while still getting some of the warmth and attention a real relationship would offer. Past hurt makes commitment unsafe: For many people, a previous relationship that ended badly makes naming something new feel genuinely frightening, not just inconvenient. Staying in the maybe zone becomes a way to test whether this person is trustworthy before risking being vulnerable by committing, especially if trust was broken the last time around. Couple sitting together in an undefined relationship or maybelationship (Image Source: Pixabay)Does freedom cause more anxiety than uncertainty?Experts note that it can do both, depending on what someone wants from the relationship.Story continues below this adDamini says, “If you really want a low-pressure connection, uncertainty can feel liberating at first as there is less pressure to define the future and lower expectations. But when one partner becomes emotionally attached, and begins to crave consistency or commitment, that same uncertainty can become anxiety provoking. They might start to analyse messages, changes in communication, how much effort the other person is putting in or whether asking for clarity will push them away.”On a psychological level, unpredictability can also heighten our fixation on a connection. Damini says, “If love, attention or reassurance is inconsistent, we may spend more mental energy trying to work out where we stand.”So, the important distinction is between uncertainty as a function of exploration, and uncertainty as the relationship itself.However, Dr Chandni mentions, “None of this means people choosing ambiguity are being dishonest on purpose. Somewhere down the line, someone usually has to choose anyway, whether that means finally naming what this is, or finally admitting it was never going to become anything more. Ambiguity can delay that moment, but it can’t cancel it.”Story continues below this adDISCLAIMER: This article is based on information from the public domain and/or the experts we spoke to.