David says that he was depressed after Kalank tanked at the box office (Image: Instagram/varundvn)A child’s setback can sometimes affect parents far more deeply than outsiders realise — something David Dhawan recently admitted with surprising honesty. Speaking at the trailer launch of Hai Jawani Toh Ishq Hona Hai, the filmmaker opened up about how strongly he reacted to his son Varun Dhawan’s first major box-office disappointment, Kalank.“There’s one film of his that didn’t work, and it depressed me. It was a very big film. Karan Johar must have sold his last shirt to make that movie! That film was Kalank,” David said.Varun also recalled how unsettling the experience was for him. “When I had my first flop, which happened after a couple of hits, it shook me very badly. I wondered, yeh kaise ho gaya, kyun ho gaya? This is because I had a row of hits. My father always told me that it is the law of averages,” he said.Their candid exchange raises a relatable question: why can a child’s professional setback feel so personal for parents?DISCLAIMER: This article is based on information from the public domain and/or the experts we spoke to. Always consult your health practitioner before starting any routine.When children’s setbacks feel personal As per psychologists, many parents feel their kids disappointments as if they’re their own, like David did (Image: Instagram/varundvn)According to Dr Murali Krishna, Visiting Consultant – Psychiatry & Counselling Services at Aster RV Hospital, Bangalore, Varun’s reaction reflects something psychologists often see when repeated success begins shaping identity.After a string of wins, people may unconsciously start equating achievement with competence, stability, and even self-worth. When a setback arrives, especially early in a career, it may not feel like just one professional disappointment, but a deeply personal blow.Story continues below this adThis can trigger emotional shock, anxiety, self-doubt, and even fear around losing public validation — particularly in competitive, high-visibility industries like cinema. That helps explain why Varun said the flop “shook” him.David’s response, meanwhile, reflects a different but equally understandable emotional pattern: parental identification. Dr Krishna explains that many parents internalise their children’s disappointments as if they were their own, especially when they have witnessed the hard work, pressure, expectations, and sacrifices behind the journey.Also Read | Varun Dhawan’s ‘filmy’ childhood habit: Why he cried in front of the mirrorA parent’s response may come from empathy, protectiveness, helplessness, or simply the emotional closeness that makes a child’s pain feel intensely personal. David’s own framing — referencing the scale of Kalank and the stakes involved — suggests that awareness.Interestingly, Varun’s mention of his father’s “law of averages” advice points to a healthier coping mindset too. Experts say accepting that setbacks are a normal part of any long career can reduce perfectionism and help restore emotional balance after disappointment. Because while ambition can drive success, tying identity too tightly to outcomes can make inevitable failures feel far heavier than they need to.Story continues below this adAnd this is hardly limited to Bollywood. Whether it is exam results, job rejections, sporting losses, or career setbacks, many parents quietly carry their children’s disappointments in deeply personal ways. David Dhawan simply happened to say it out loud.DISCLAIMER: This article is based on information from the public domain and/or the experts we spoke to. Always consult your health practitioner before starting any routine.