Why Gaurav Gera chose singlehood: Understanding avoidant attachment and the fear of intimacy. (Source: Instagram/@kapiltejwaniofficial)Bollywood actor Gaurav Gera has been single for a while now. “It’s not my scene,” he shared during a recent conversation with Humans of Bombay. “There was a time, I was very deeply in..And after that, I never want to go back into it. I don’t want to make anyone so special that they have the power to hurt me,” the Dhurandhar star further added.Gera’s reluctance to date and open himself up to love and relationships eventually shaped his attachment style, with Dr Samant Darshi, consultant psychiatrist, Psymate Healthcare & Yatharth Super-Speciality Hospitals, explaining it as an avoidant attachment.Simply put, it is a type of attachment characterised by a fear of intimacy and a tendency to avoid closeness in relationships. According to him, people with avoidant attachment often view themselves as “self-sufficient and independent, and may have trouble trusting others or allowing themselves to be vulnerable.”Some signs to watch out for in an avoidant attachment style:Difficulty forming close relationships: You keep your partner, emotionally, at arm’s length because it feels safer, but they often accuse you of being distant.Difficulty expressing emotions: When your partner seeks intimacy with you, do your barriers go up? The more they try to get close, the more you combat.A strong need for personal space: You hold back on starting new relationships because it is so hard to trust people.Story continues below this adDifficulty relying on others and a tendency to avoid intimacy: You sometimes end relationships to gain a sense of freedom. View this post on Instagram A post shared by HOB Originals (@humansofbombayoriginals)How to get past it?Dr Darshi explained that having experienced emotionally distant, detached caregivers while growing up, is where people learn to be emotionally independent. “Such people aren’t comfortable with emotional intimacy, and self-reliance and self-sufficiency become their foremost needs in a relationship,” he added.To overcome or manage avoidant attachment style, Dr Darshi suggested engaging in therapy with a mental health professional. “A therapist can help you identify the root causes of your attachment issues and develop coping mechanisms for dealing with them. They can also help you work on building trust and forming healthy relationships. It can also be beneficial to practice self-reflection and self-awareness,” he told indianexpress.com.Pay attention to your own emotions and needs, and work on developing a sense of self-worth. Dr Darshi believes it is important to challenge any negative beliefs you may have about relationships and trust, and to make an effort to be more open and vulnerable with others. “It may take time, but with effort and support, it is possible to overcome avoidant attachment style and build fulfilling relationships,” he said.ALSO READ | Relationship expert suggests your attachment style can affect your dating success: what can helpAvoidantly attached people also have fewer, less intense friendships as they are uncomfortable being emotionally expressive or vulnerable in relationships and prefer to maintain emotional distance.Story continues below this adCompared to them, Dr Darshi highlighted how securely attached individuals tend to have stable, healthy and fulfilling friendships. “They are comfortable being emotional and vulnerable amidst their friends, are able to communicate openly and honestly, are able to set healthy boundaries while being supportive of their partners. This leads to long lasting, trustworthy relationships,” he concluded.DISCLAIMER: This article is based on information from the public domain and/or the experts we spoke to.