I recently moved for work and found a decent apartment listing. Rent was fair, location was perfect, and the landlord seemed normal at first. We schedule a viewing, everything looks good. I tell him I’m interested. Then he starts explaining his conditions. He says he prefers someone “low impact.” I’m like… okay? I work most of the day anyway. Then he clarifies: No cooking with “strong smells” (he specifically listed onions, garlic, and fried food… so basically cooking). Showers should be “kept under 5 minutes” to manage water usage. No guests. At all. Not even just one friend dropping by. Laundry only once every two weeks. No working from home because it uses too much electricity. Lights should be off by 10pm unless absolutely necessary. At this point I’m thinking he just wants an empty apartment that pays him rent. But it gets better. He says: I’m willing to be flexible on rent if you’re not around much. Ideally someone who travels a lot. So I ask, half-joking, “So you basically want someone who pays rent but doesn’t live here? He looks me dead in the eye and says: “Exactly. That’s the perfect tenant.” Ah yes, my dream home: a place where I can’t eat, exist, or turn on lights… but can definitely pay. Told him I'll think aboutnit but never showed up again.   submitted by   /u/GuryPetals [link]   [comments]