Pregnancy can do a number on your sex life. Sometimes you feel tender, tired, swollen, and deeply uninterested in being touched by anyone. Other times, your body feels unusually sensitive, and you remember that intimacy can still be part of the picture. Both are normal, and neither says anything alarming about your relationship. Medical guidance says sex during a healthy pregnancy is generally safe unless a doctor or midwife tells you otherwise.That leaves most couples dealing with a more familiar problem, which is figuring out how to stay connected when comfort, energy, and mood are on a rollercoaster. A piece from Parents, drawing on guidance from OB-GYN Brett Worly, M.D., and sex therapist Madeleine Castellanos, M.D., offers a pretty useful reminder that intimacy during pregnancy works better when people let go of pressure and adjust to reality.Here are ways to practice intimacy while pregnant:1. Let desire warm up slowlyDr. Worly’s advice centers on building desire and emotional connection without putting sex on a timetable. That makes plenty of sense. Pregnancy is not exactly a season of life that responds well to pressure.2. Use the second trimester while it’s still friendlyA lot of people feel pretty rough in the first trimester and physically uncomfortable in the third. Many early symptoms ease as the first trimester ends, which explains why the middle stretch can feel more manageable.3. Stop panicking about hurting the babyThis is one of the biggest mental roadblocks for people, and it’s understandable. The good news is that medical experts say sex is generally safe during a healthy pregnancy, and the baby is protected unless a provider has given you a reason to be cautious.4. Get screens out of the roomMake the bedroom a screen-free zone. It’s a lot easier to feel connected when there isn’t a phone lighting up the nightstand every few minutes. If you want intimacy to have a real shot, give each other your full attention.5. Talk about sex before you try to have itDr. Castellanos recommends making room for desire and closeness before either of you expects sex to magically come together. That might mean flirting more, talking through what feels good right now, and being direct about what your body is not especially interested in.6. Use lube without making it a whole thingVaginal dryness can come with pregnancy, thanks to hormonal changes, and medical experts say lubricant can help reduce discomfort during sex. There’s nothing unromantic about making things feel better.7. Find positions your body can tolerateWhat feels comfortable can change a lot over the course of pregnancy. Medical experts say position changes can help, especially as your body grows and your range of motion shifts. Pillows can help support your back, hips, and whatever else is complaining.8. Count intimacy even when sex is off the tableConnection still counts when intercourse doesn’t sound appealing. Massage, kissing, cuddling, and actual attention all matter. Pregnancy changes the rules often enough without anybody feeling forced to have sex.Pregnancy intimacy has to be flexible. Some days it will look sexy, some days cute, and some days completely off the menu. What helps is honesty, a little patience, and a willingness to measure closeness in other ways.The post 8 Tips for Great Sex During Pregnancy appeared first on VICE.